Fear of failure
Fear of self
Fear of society
Fear of success
Fear of pain and hard work
You name it, and there are hundreds of fear out there lurking in the darkness of our mind, making us surrender to our knees,asking us to forget success rather think about our insecurity or failure. Yes indeed,I am talking about that kind of a fear.
There are two kinds of fear, existential and hypothetical or self created/self believed ones.
Existential fear, like the fear of lions if you happen to have one is good, fear of jumping into a high current river,fear of slapping your teacher because the consequences would not be very encouraging,etc etc are the good kinds of fear and I shall not want to touch them here. Let us all have this kind of fear,for they itself make us human enough to love and care for our existence.
But what about the fears that are non existent. That take us away from our own well beings and keeps us confined to the life like that of in a ghetto.
The kind of fear that I am talking about.....yes you got it...the fear of failure when you want to do something new,something different in life. That is the kind of fear that sucks,and to an extent we are sucked because we allow it suck us.
Take for an example,if you are caught in a certain stream of a career in your life. Though this career provides you with security that you feel is required at the moment, but what about it in the future and in the near future. One day you tend to realize that your present sucks and you want to change it for the better and for the future. But do you do? No you don't. Why? Though you want to try something else but that something else is so something else that someone else from some other else's place has not tried to do this very something else.What I was trying to say is that you try to do something which is out of the box and people have not done it,and this something comes at a cost which you do not want to part with. We wan a gurantee that this something else that I wish to try has to be a success. But no. We can't. Because actually if you are successful,then you are successful or you are not. That is as simple as that. This thing usually happens when we want to try something creative,or when we want to enter a particular field which people say is very risky and some crap like that. Do we try?No.
"Throughout the centuries there were men who took first steps down new roads armed with nothing but their own vision"
--Ayn Rand
Yes that is the confidence that is indeed required. But what she says,is it possible? Well I don't know how to answer that question,but for certainly I can say that yes it is NOT impossible.
So how do we get to the affirmative state of the possibility? At the moment I just said that it is not impossible, that is very much a positive statement but it is not an affirmative statement. Why? simply because we are not speaking it that way and that requires confidence.
So from where is the confidence going to come?
For confidence to come I guess the biggest indicator is self awareness. Yes that is one quality or thing we need to have. Self awareness! Most of the people tend to run away from themselves. They never like staying alone,why, because they tend to hear voices which comes out from their own,but it seems so like a stranger. Yes, that is the unconscious voice, the voice that connects to the reservoir of knowledge,of everything. That is the voice that is telling you what you ought to do. I guess Paulo Coelho in one of his books defines it as something that connects us to the womb the earth. When we are self aware, we tend be in synchronous with this very voice. We tend to teach her,she tends to teach us. We learn,we grow we see and yes we sometimes see the future. That is something like listening to the intuition. Well I guess need not need to mention that self awareness also means and thus includes and thus is what is the general perception is that,it means ones strength, weakness and taste. In a nutshell, a realistic self perception.
Confidence also comes from one of its biggest ally,self love. I am not talking about naricissiom, which people tend to get confused with, but purely self love. That is to say, doing things that you love and are good for you and match your skills. Thus in a way,developing your USP. At this point someone would say,I love to see moives so what should I do,keep watching movies or what. Well the question is can you? Well from now on try watching the movies that you don't like and then tell me,how you feel? Become a movie critic for that matter? Well let me assure you you will have the worse time of the day if you only watch the movies for entertainment purpose and when you will have to do that as a profession. There is marked difference. Thus check your premises, most probably something is wrong.
Self love is not punishing yourself and doing things at the cost of yourself. How many times have you compromised on your career choice just because of some obscure reason like family and stuff? I am not talking about compromises where you give up Berger for aloo tikki just because your girlfriend wants to eat aloo tikki. I am talking about specific life and career goals. When you compromise on that level,I can assure you disaster awaits you as well as your loved ones for whom you compromised.
The point is fear can be removed and confidence brought in,and yes that dos require hard work.
Rest is up to you.
Hope things be good and you achieve what you want.
Amen
Friday, August 29, 2008
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